First off let me start by telling you a little bit about my journey in this blog world. So first off I come from a very talented family. most of them draw and dance. Now I can dance but I’m not really someone whos comfortable enough to go up and perform because I think too much. I swear your mind is your biggest weapon but can also be your downfall. Plus, my little sisters and cousin have always had the spotlight when it came to dancing. As for the artsy part, I’m ok but not great. It doesn’t come naturally I have to really concentrate and take my time. Also, I over think things and I’m very anal about things being perfect so one little-mistaken detail I will trash the whole thing. So it’s not the easiest coming thing for me and again the spotlight for that has always gone to them.
Writing though! that’s my forte. I love to write. To me, this is the one thing that I don’t over analyze. It is my own personal therapy. I feel like with writing I can be myself, flaws and all. Paper doesn’t judge. so of course as a child, I had thousands of journals. The pen was my voice when I had no voice and the paper was the listening ear. Eventually, I became comfortable with sharing my work and started getting picked for writing groups. My work would be published in school books and papers. I would have shows where I would recite my poetry and everything. To be honest, I didn’t care much for homework, so I was always last minute with it. I could write the hell out of an essay though. I would be on the bus, in homeroom sometimes lunch or another class writing a last-minute paper. Hand it in and get a better grade than the girl who worked on her paper for 2 weeks.
I also always loved to read. From Maya Angelou to Edgar Allen Poe to Tennesse Williams to Shakespear to Nathaniel Hawthorne. I mean even authors like Zane, Omar Tyree, Sista Soulja and Terri Woods. I LOVED TO READ!!!! SO naturally Reading and Writing came hand in hand. My senior year of high school going into my freshman year of college, I had decided I wanted to write a book. I chose to start an urban fiction book. After the first two chapters, I lost interest in it. Between graduation, prom and entering a new world of college life I push the book thing to the side. My journal writing and even reading dwindled down some. I continued to read just not as much and writing only for school purposes or in my journal when either something extremely good happened (my first love of 4 years at the time finally said the “L” word) or something extremely bad happened (The love of my life broke my heart after 5 years). So yea that was it. a couple of journal entries here and there.
It wasn’t until my mid 20’s that I really decided to give writing a go around. I came across the notebook I had started to write my urban fiction book. It brought back so many memories and reminded me of why I use to write and how writing made me feel. I swear it was fate because at that time I need it. My life was a bit chaotic and I needed my therapy again. So I decided urban fiction wasn’t where I needed to start. I knew I definitely wanted to write a book but I wanted it to be a bit more personal. I wanted to dive into love. Talk about the good and bad aspects of love. I wanted to talk about my own personal experiences. the book would be called “Looking for LOVE in all the WRONG places”. In the book, I would focus on 4 major relationships I had that went turmoil including the one I was at the time was currently in. I would mention one or two minor relationships but focus mainly on those 4. I brainstormed and drafted the first 5 chapters which started with me at the age of 12 prior to the chaos. I was proud of the work I was doing.
Then the unexpected happened I found out that I was EXPECTING!!!! My writing went on pause again. Not because I wasn’t motivated but because it was told I wouldn’t be able to have kids and a few health and pregnancy issues that came along with that. You can read more about that from my earlier post —-> When the Impossible became POSSIBLE!!! After my son was born I, of course, was smitten with him and focus all my attention on him and the yet again another miracle happened. I became pregnant with my second son and that pregnancy was even harder than the first one.
When the excitement settled down and I was able to get back into the grove. I returned to my book only to find out that that computer I was using had crashed and burned and all the work I had done was lost. I became unmotivated and decided that maybe it wasn’t meant to be. So, I moved on and focused more on work and the boys…….
Stay tuned I will continue on with this story in Pt. 2